Ground Pine and Hope

ground pineOnce a year my Mom would send my Dad and my brothers and I out in the woods in search of ground pine. It was almost always in November and through the years, Dad became so used to the different areas where it grew that it was less searching for ground pine as it was picking it up from the woods. This interesting little plant – or weed, some would say – was a needed ingredient in our annual Advent Wreath creation in the Sears home.

I remember several wreaths. There was one that was made out of an old piece of a stump. There was one created in Cub Scouts with acorns arranged as candle holders. There was one that was made of metal one year, but that one didn’t last. I don’t think any of us liked it.

It was the tradition in the home of my youth together on the Sunday evenings of Advent to light our candle for that week, read Scripture and pray together as a family. Most of the time, I must admit, I was just praying that we would be done in time for us to watch “The Wonderful World of Disney.” And yet, despite the lack of attention that I gave to the whole ritual, something about it stuck with me.

Maybe it was the fresh smell of the ground pine. (I don’t think I mentioned that we would pick enough of this stuff so that mom could keep some “wet” and change it out each week.) Perhaps it was the flicker of the flame on the candles. It might even have been the way that my two brothers and I would fight with one another over the right to light the candles or better yet to blow them out and let the hot wax “accidentally” drip into our hands as we did so.

Something stuck about Advent because this is the time of the year when I become my most hopeful.

I look at the headlines of a burning city in Missouri. I realize that I will never see the world, never understand power, never truly grasp what justice means to someone of a different race than my own. I watch our nation grapple with figuring out how to handle such things and I hear so many voices crying out “doom”. But not me. I remember the evergreen of Advent and know that somewhere in the presence of Jesus there is hope.

I look at the area I live in – Southern West Virginia – and I listen to so many people talk about how we are losing everything because Coal is no long King. I wish I could buy into that message and join the war against the war against coal. But I don’t. This time of year, I see the evergreen and I can’t help but think that there is a greater King than Coal. Sure, he was born in a stable. He was one of the poor. But maybe why that is why we should hold him as our King even more. He truly is one of us.

I look at mainline churches and notice the struggle that so many are having. Some are fighting within about beliefs and doctrines. Others are the ever present worship war. Some are watching their average attendance plummet because members do not commit themselves to attending as often. Some of them, like the church I serve, are watching budget shortfalls eat away at the hope people have for continuing to do the ministry we already have and the flame of any new idea for ministry and mission.

But folks…to me…this season of Advent is the greatest season of Hope that I know.

I believe we will find some way to balance justice and power in a world that has for so long ignored the voices of minorities.

I believe the King will show us a new way to power our economy in Southern West Virginia.

And I believe that church’s will find peace, they will grow committed disciples, and they will even find people who can give the money needed to grow ministry into the next year.

It’s Advent folks…and I am full of hope.

Perhaps it time to go ground pine hunting!!

The Valley of the Shadow of Death

Another thoughtful reflection on depression and mental illness.

A. G. VanBibber Reed's avatar

Tuesday evening, my heart broke twice.

First, it broke when I received the news that Pat, a beloved parishioner, had passed away.  Pat was a wonderful woman who will leave behind a legacy of riotous laughter and chaotic family gatherings. I’ve only known her for the past two years, and she’s been battling one health malady after another since then, but she always did so with a quick, acerbic wit and a smile.

I will never forget sitting in her hospital room after she suffered a stroke and watching her rib the doctors and nurses and orderlies and janitors alike. No one left her hospital room that wasn’t smiling and laughing. That was Pat. She was funny and she always made the most of whatever situation she was in, no matter how bad.

When I got home that evening I sat down to check Facebook before calling it a night…

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A Cross Between Two Thieves

Not my will, but yours…

    I know that I have heard these words hundreds, if not thousands of times in my life in the church. They are words of Jesus as he prays before being arrested. They are words of Jesus as his closest disciples fall asleep. However, most of the time that these words hammer through the noise of my brain, I hear them as words of surrender and resignation on the part of Jesus. Today, for whatever reason, I heard the deep seated struggle of will that is inherit in these words.

    Jesus, really, really struggled to let go of his own will and follow the will of God.

I am thinking about this not so much because of some struggle of will that I have in my personal life as a member of the Jesus Revolution. I have those struggles and I probably always will but they don’t upset me all that much. Today I was struck with these words as they described the relationship between two parts of the Triune God and what that could mean for Christian unity today. In my mind, there are few things more broken in our world than the idea of Christian unity. We simply suck at getting along with one another.

I get the sense from so many people that “being one, as the Father and I are one” – the very prayer Jesus had for his followers – is something that should be simple and easy for us to accomplish. I get that sense from those who say, “Just follow the Bible and we can have unity” as well as from those who say, “Just love like Jesus loved” and we will have the unity for which Jesus prayed. I think both groups – and I can be found lurking around in either from time to time – totally miss the real struggle the Son had with the Father over this picture of unity.

What if the unity found between Father and Son, between Jesus and the God-Head, is more akin to struggle than it is to a sense of peace. (Images of Jacob wrestling in the night for a blessing come to mind.) I know that we all want peace, but that is not what Jesus infers in the Garden, on the cross or even to us. Yes, he leaves us a “peace that is not like the world gives” but perhaps that peace is what we find when we allow grace to abound with ourselves (as we struggle in ourselves) and what we find when we allow grace to abound amidst the struggles we have with those whose idea of God’s will bumps up against a difference in our hearts.

Listen…I know that this is not a completely fleshed out, well-thought bit of theology I am espousing today. It is a start to say the very least. Perhaps you can add to the discussion. Perhaps I can capture it better in another use of language too:

 

The battle of will
is a thumping of the heart,
a throbbing of the mind,
and a bleeding of the soul.

Or so it seems. Or so it seems.

It is a battle, a battle among thieves:
One who steals freedom in the name of holiness
And
One who steals holiness in the name of freedom.

But maybe, perhaps maybe…
On those days when the battle wages
within and without
with an intensity that hurls invective and certainty
like arrows into the always soft flesh of the gut –
Perhaps, just maybe,
There is another war cry
A cry that is heard
among the wounded,
the stilted,
and even on the lips on the silent
as they breath with Spirit Sound
the truest cry of unity.

Grace.

Grace for self. Grace for others.
Grace like that offered by a Savior,
A Savior between two thieves.

 

©2014, Scott Sears

The eyes of all

The sun stretches over the mountains
ready to offer this day a heartfelt hug.

Songs bounce on the wind from bird to bird to bird
to land in the ear of the Holy One.
Buds peak out of branches,
blushing against their grayish limbs.

Flowers – still waiting for showers of wind and rain

to baptize their petals – shout “Alleluia” nonetheless.

 

It’s the season of Lent – the world around me rejoices.

 

It’s the season of Lent – I shall join their chorus directed by God.

 

 

Based on Isaiah 49:8-15

© 2014, Scott Sears

Five Entrances to Healing

Now in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate there is a pool, called in Hebrew Beth-zatha, which has five porticoes. In these lay many invalids—blind, lame, and paralysed.

Based on John 5:113, 5-16 (NRSVA)

The pool of healing

    is always before me

    and yet I sit in the portico

    waiting.

 

Perhaps I sit among my family – they love me,

    they cherish me just as I am
    yet I see their eyes darting from the pool to me, me to the pool.

 

Sometimes I rest among the portico of the very word of God.

    It brings me comfort.

    Yet, it too stirs waters

    within and without.

 

At time, I find my rest among covenant colleagues.

    I pray for them…they pray for me.

    We challenge and hold accountable.

    But would we carry each other to the healing water –

        stumbling, bumbling, tripping all the way?

        I like to think so…I like knowing it is so.

 

Other times I find myself resting in the

    busyness of The Work

    to which I am called.

    I visit…I pray…I produce…I fail to do something.

    And quietly (or not so quietly, actually) I bitch at myself

        for not doing more.

    I guess it’s easy in this crowded portico

        to direct those complaints at others I love.

 

And yet, there is one final entrance

    one portico to the pool of healing.

It must be the one where I find myself

    lounging in the shad the most…

    the one where I am alone…

    the one where I’ve grown comfortable…

    the one where I don’t have to change

        ’cause nothing else ever changes.

    The one where I hesitate the most – just like you.

 

Still. Still! Jesus comes and says,

    “Do you…Do you want to be well?”

 

The pool of healing

    is always before me

    and yet I sit in the portico

    waiting.

 

© 2014, Scott Sears